One of the problems with taking happy pills and sleepy pills (that’s right, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs are heading up the crack team of scientists down at Eli Lily) is they tend to have unintended consequences. And contrary to the lawyers’ rapid-fire promises at the ends of the TV ads, side effects are NOT generally mild.
Case in point: Just about an hour ago I had what could only be the sort of morning that gave rise to the cliché “a rude awakening.” After switching up my sleeping pill regimen a bit last night — and staying up just long enough to kick my husband’s butt at five rounds of Boom Boom Rocket on the Xbox, while hallucinating I might add — I awoke eight hours later not to the sound of an alarm, or a leaf blower across the street, or the gentle nudge of the tooth fairy stuffing ones under my pillow. Nay.
I screamed myself awake today after sweating through a night terror that involved a giant snake slithering through my apartment, chasing me, then disappearing, then stalking me and waiting to strike. Call me crazy (and you’d be correct), but I will be writing at the library today…with a shovel by my side and a Ginsu knife in my sock.
Here’s hoping that tonight I just get the old biting-your-tongue-off side effect.
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