While waiting in line at Ralph’s last week, something hellacious distracted me from my surreptitious attempts to read The Enquirer’s headlines about Kirsty Alley’s ass cellulite. The checker passed a palm-sized cutout of a shamrock to the philanthropist in front of me, who was now not only making my ice cream melt so she could [...]
Anxiety Activators 64, 65, and 66: The Mystery Guest Trapped in my Heater, WebMD, and Water Poisoning
I awoke this morning to the pleasant sounds of some small animal dying a claustrophobic death in our wall heater, and the uncharacteristic urge to do something healthy today. Perhaps the frantic clawing noises echoing through the hallway reminded me life is short; then again it was probably just my morbid disposition that did that. [...]
