I’m watching Big Brother but I can’t focus because all I want in life is for CBS to replace it with a spin off called Little Brother: The Midget Season. When will the discrimination end? I’m so tired of giants! It’s not like I’m advocating any tossing challenges, so don’t get all high and mighty [...]
Anxiety Alleviator #10: Sheriff John Burnell’s Disproportionate Amounts of Rage
As you know, I recently went through a period of abstaining from my habitual consumption of hours upon hours of fine TV viewing per night. It was a difficult adjustment that involved a lot of reading of books, gnashing of teeth, and contemplation of jumping out windows. But then I realized we only live on [...]
Anxiety Activator # 9: My TV. That’s Right, Keep it up, TiVo, and I Will Bitch Slap You to Next Week’s New Episode of Locked up Abroad!
Last night I watched five hour-long episodes of Locked up Abroad on the National Geographic channel before my TiVo committed suicide again. It keeps making these exasperated sounds (like how I imagine the robot from Short Circuit would squeal if someone was trying to murder him) before it freezes and shuts down, leaving me to [...]
